I'd love to be a chandelier
Hanging from the ceiling.
I want to swing around
And when the light hits me
(hurts me)
In the right way,
You'll be able to see blue veins
Under
Paper thin
Crystal clear
Completely pale
Skin.
The princesses in TV
Never had dark skin,
Only perfectly curled hair
Unlike mine.
My curls were wild,
Untamed,
Just like the beast inside of me
That my boyfriends had to tame
Countless times.
(I never told them to,
I didn't even know there was something in me
To be tamed in the first place.
I'm glad that they opened my eyes.)
Those blue eyes,
They gave me as a present,
Were so much prettier than
My black ones.
But after some days
The dream vanished,
After they extracted
The morphine from my blood.
My mother said that she was scared as they did so.
She told me that
She was afraid that
I'd vanish completely,
I mean, I'm not sure where she comes from,
But
She told me that
It looked almost as if
There was only a skeleton beside her on the bed
And not really a person.
(I was so happy in that moment,
Maybe,
Soon I'd be able to turn
Into a skeleton.
They are really pretty and skinny and white,
You know?)
They say you are what you eat
And
I haven't eaten in three days.
And now I'm unsure,
Am I nothing or successful?